 |
So give me reason ; To prove me wrong ,
To wash this memory clean .
My name is [x]love :D
There is no other info about me .
And all these are just my dreamland .
Dreams that I dream of at night .
Don't like me ? You can leave by the red 'x' on the top right hand corner .
You are @ theundyingpainofmine.blogspot.com.
I don't need anyone change my weaknesses or tell me my strengths , I just need someone who'll appreciate me for everythg that I am .
"It takes a lifetime to find someone, but only a moment to fall in love."
Layout: vehemency
Icon: reruntherace
# 6.1 ' 06 # Cresmic # Amanda # Angshuang # Ashley # Ben # Celin # Christine # Clarissa # Daniel # Dewey # Dloy # Emily # Enya # Eunice # Fraser # George # Hafizah # Huiwen # Huiyun # Hyde # Isaac # Isabel # James # Jason # Jeff # Jeng Teng # Jessie # Jia Hang # Jia Min # Jiaqi # Joelle # Jovan # Kjw # Kylie # Li Hui # Marcus Mook # Matthew # Michelle Leow # Michelle Tan # Nicky # Pearl # Pearlyn # Peiqi # Qianhui # Rason # Sarah # Sean Tan # Soon Heng # Sophin # Tian # Tim # Tze Lin # Vicky # Wesley # Xinyi # Yi Wei # Yunen # Zhao Ru # Zhen Ting # Zhi Hao
Past records .
Fk this world .
Sunday, July 5, 2009,
Wtf wtf , I'm damn sad now lah .
And I'm damn freaking hurt .
How the hell can you do that to me ?
You scold me , because my phone has no network coverage ?
Is that my fault ?
You don't want to change a phone for me ,
So I end up having to use a old model phone which sucks .
And obviously , I can't hear you over the phone because that whole fking phone sucks right ?
Ya lah , maybe I'm deaf lah , can't hear you lah .
But even if I'm really deaf , isn't it your fault still ?
You refuse to let me on music on computer ,
And always insist that I plug the ear phone in .
You always come into my room and talk crap ,
And when that happens , I'll on the ear piece volume to max just to shut your naggings off .
What the fk lah , you couple always gang up on me .
You all always make me cry .
If you get so pissed with fetching me ,
Thn don't fetch me lah ! Not like I can't go home on my own .
Rather thn you come and fetch me , thn make yourself unhappy and make me cry .
It fking hurts yknw .
I have no one to talk to about this , no one understands .
You all treat me so badly yet I keep bearing with it .
I don't knw how much long I can hold on .
I think it's a matter of time before I go mad .
I really can't take it .
You make me cry every single day without fail .
Thanks , I'm really going blind soon .
I've been getting blurry visions this few days some parts of the day .
No , it's not because of my tears , I don't knw why either .
But I'm fking going blind alrdy !
Can't you stop making me cry anymore ?
Thanks for ruining my life .
What kind of parents are you ?
Seriously . People's parents force them to rebond their hair ,
Force them to wear braces , give them things that they want and need .
But you all , no matter how I beg , I never get anythg that I want .
I want so many things and yet I can't even get one of them .
I want a camera , Ipod , braces , pink converse shoes , a new phone and more whatever .
But out of these things , you can't even give me one of them ?
Not even when I worked so hard the last term ?
You knw others get a laptop for getting the same results as me ,
Yet I got nthg . Okay , I don't deny that I got 100 plus bucks from you all .
But you knw what is 100 bucks nowadays ?
That is the amount of money most people get when they just simply ask money from their parents to go out .
Yet I only get that once a year IF ONLY I get good results .
And if I don't , I get nthg , nthg at all .
Do you all love me at all ?
Am I really your daughter ? Why do you treat me like that ?
Why do you treat me like your punching bag ?
I always get scolded for nthg !
You knw even my past boyfriends ?
None of them made me cry like that ,
None of them scolded me in the face like you two did .
None of them even rejected me things that I wanted .
Not saying that I even asked them for things .
They gave it to me willingly .
You all gave me things that I asked for , and you're like so unwilling to give it to me .
You all don't really love me right ?
Seriously , thn don't fking give birth to me .
I'm so fking tired of all these .
I've been trying to restrain myself from using vulgarities these few days .
You can ask people arnd me , whenever I want to use a vulgarity ,
I would say 'Fish' instead . Why do I do that for ?
Because I wanted to impress you two .
But you all don't fking appreciate it , so why should I continue to fking try not to lose my temper ?
Why in the fking hell should I ?
You tell me why . No one cares anyway .
Maybe I should just fk off and die right ?
No one truly wants me anyway .
No one truly loves me anyway .
They either want my body or want my looks or want my money .
Anyway those who fking want my money ,
Take it all lah , I don't want it anymore .
I hate all my worldly desires , I never get them anyway .
It's so fking disappointing . I hate my life .
I want my old life back .I want you back , yes you . At least you could make me happy and they can't .
At least you tried , and I believe I did love you for a period of time .
But I knw you don't want me back anymore .
I knw you fucking hate me for all that I've done to you .
You want revenge ? You can do it back to me .
Do it ! Just do it man . I owe you this .
Maybe I'll just fucking commit suicide after all this anyway .
I won't haunt anyone of you . I promise .
I don't want to go and bug people about those that were never mine .
Afterall , I won't get anythg that I want in this world .
What's the fucking use of living anyway .
Ugh , anyway I'm not only crying because of this .
There's a few other things .
Maybe I'm too petty , maybe I'm just too sensitive .
Whatever , I'm too sad to type alrdy .
Dreamway ♥ .
9:53 PM <3